... only to read it and continually nod my head in agreement.
The standard advice we give young people is to finish their education, get a good job and find themselves before taking the plunge of getting married. It sounds right, but here’s the catch. Psychologists tell us that character solidifies at about age 30. After that it becomes not impossible but vastly more difficult for the couple truly to knit themselves into unity. Youth, by contrast is more flexible and a young couple has the benefit of being able to build from scratch, if you will, instead of trying to remodel. My observation has been that the younger a couple marries, the more success they will have forging a coherent family life rather than persevering forever in what is more or less a roommate model of marriage: two separate lives lived in the same household with some necessary overlap.
I went over to Faith and Family this morning and read this article on marrying young.
This little excerpt was quite interesting ...
I read that to my husband and of course his first *wise* comment was that he was lucky he married me young because if I went off to "find myself" I may never have found him.
I don't know how young is young when they talk about marrying young ... is it 18, 19, 20, or 21? My husband and I met at 16 and dated for 8 years before we married at the age of 24. Our life went from high school, college, jobs, children and more children. We felt like we grew up together ... learning as we went to make the right decisions for our marriage and children. Of course we made some mistakes along the way ... most couples do. I do feel like we always work hard to try to make things right ... to make improvements. We always evaluate situations.
I'm always saddened at how easily people can jump into a marriage and jump right back out of one. It makes me think that communication must have really been missing, efforts were minimal, and selfish thoughts took over.
I know that I am blessed and I know that the decision to marry my husband was the best one I ever did make. He is my best friend and we have so much fun together. He puts up with way more of my quirky ways. I take death 'til we part very serious. WISHING many more would think the same.
Comments
I have always been a late bloomer and marrying young would have been a disaster. (I was engaged at 22 but thankfully, that ended.)
Having married Matt at 41...he is truly my knight.
I don't think there is a cookie cutter answer for this issue.
You and your husband have a very sweet story...the kind that most people dream about.
W
It is true that you "grow up together" (hopefully!) when you marry young -- my hubby and I say that all the time.
We also have a habit of talking about childhood memories, forgetting that we weren't together then!
Sometimes love comes later, of course, and that can certainly be God's plan. I just think it is a serious mistake for couples to meet and wait FOREVER to get married, waiting for things to be "perfect." (Usually for financial reasons.) That only leads to temptations in my opinion.