"A Wink and a Smile"

I sent these 4 off to school yesterday. It's a new start AGAIN for them. They've all been to our local Catholic School before, but for a few years we dabbled in a new public elementary school and homeschooling for that tall girl on the far right ;) The 8th grader had a great day, the 6th grader NEVER wants to return, the 4th grader didn't meet one new kid because she KNOWS THEM ALL ALREADY, and the 1st grader had a horrible day because someone pushed her. This really explains a lot about my girls ... there is the social one, the nervous/uneasy about changes one, the happy go lucky one, and the grumpy one. It's probably not good to label your children, but I'm sure all mothers out there think labels in their heads ... yes? This would be the oldest girl. She did go off to the 11th grade TODAY, but somehow in the chaos, I never captured a picture. Guess I will do that later ... {e} at the beach in her spiffy green dress. Gorgeous, huh! I'm ho...

This summer has been SPICY HOT. In fact this week we are pretty much looking at 100+ degree temps, and that doesn't include the HEAT INDEX. For those not familiar with the words heat index, it basically means how it really feels outside . That all translates to a feeling of being ON THE SURFACE OF THE SUN ... ick! BUT, on the bright side ... summer break is nearly over (yes, this may be the first year I am happy to say that) my grass grows slower because of the high temps (this means less mowing) my in and out, back and forth in the car should be a little bit less I normally enjoy summer, but this year it's been tougher than usual ... my oldest has a job and no car or driver's license my driving around town has been ridiculously silly (too many places; too little time) bickering children a bit of school craziness with a big switch (now I've got 4/5 of my girls going to Catholic school - that is a good thing) no lake days just one beach stop (which will happen soon)...

I'm not sure why I chose this photo to go with my post, but somehow I think this turtle has the same thoughts as I do ... should he leave the box or stay in? I'm not good at making decisions. I'm always second guessing if I should do something, buy something, go somewhere, etc. Should I leave Facebook ? Should I try Google+ ? Should I skip out on the tweeting business Should I blog ? I'm the kind of person that likes to try my hand at different things. I envy those who just do one thing and are really good at it. I'm no PIONEER WOMAN ... she is bigger than life. Sort of like Martha Stewart of NOW. I'm not all that disciplined. Sometimes I get into exercise and stick to it for months, but then completely fall off the wagon. I procrastinate. Often I am moving at an insane pace just to play catch up. My thoughts are not all that organized. You are reading this blog post ... yes? It's the end of July so making a resolution isn't what normally happens thi...

MY THOUGHTS... #1 I just came back from my 3rd grader's class where she presented her state research project/paper. There were some parents in the class; also watching their child present. I was relieved to see that "most" of the work shared aloud was work that looked like it belonged to a 3rd grader. One of my pet peeves these days are parents that pretty much DO THE CHILD'S WORK. I guess that's why I have "issues" when projects for these younger kids come home. It seems that many parents feel obliged to relive their elementary years (grrrrrr). So today, I didn't see nearly the "parent work" that I have seen in the past. That's a good thing! #2 Yesterday an old friend shared a music video on his facebook wall. It was by the artist P!NK and the song "F**ckin' Perfect". I see plenty of people who post videos on facebook ... I've done it myself. It just bothered me to see that on someone's wall. I only wat...

I'm fairly sure this is GOD working through my 8 year old ... So this week I will be cheerful, positive, and apparently SKINNY!

Once upon a time I blogged every day. Then my children created a busy life I could never have imagined when I was a little girl wishing to be a mommy. I'm not going to blame my children. I'll just blame my husband. Can I? Some mommies are really good at their job. Maybe they have a great calendar to rely on (I do) Maybe they plan out their weekly menus (I try) Maybe they don't need a weekly salary beyond hugs and kisses (oh, how I wish) Lately I feel like I am just throwing money this direction and that direction. Those dollars are not just for the kids, but the wonderful home we live in that seems to want to fall apart at the worst possible time. Some days I think I need to get out of this house and FIND ME A JOB THAT PAYS (money) REALITY sets in and I realize ... My children need me I actually homeschool one of them My girls and I spend a lovely amount of time driving back and forth to those swim practices that they LOVE I haven't had a real paying job in 14 years an...

It's not all that obvious, but it's there ... always there ... always has been there. It's possible that I could use to benefit from a helpful pill, but I'm anti-drug. Well, except for the occasional ibuprofen. Since I was a little girl I've been aware of so many things around me. I'm sure that isn't all that unusual. Many people are observant. For me, however, I take things in and think, THINK about those things I see and/or hear and I do NOT let them out of my head. Again, this may not be all that strange. Lord knows, there is a lot more strange out there than not. I'm really bothered by my melancholy thoughts. AT this point in my life, I've pretty much accepted that this was just the way I am ... it's in my makeup. Each morning I can dress up my face with real makeup, but at then end of the day when I wash it all off ... the same face is staring right back at me in the mirror. What I do wish for is that I wouldn't feel disappoin...

Sometimes summer can be exhausting. I won't complain too much because I am home with my girls and we really do have a lot of freedoms. BUT, I am HOME with 5 girls and we all have our own thoughts of what we want to accomplish in a day. Do we ... read books? organize the school room? go to the pool? watch TV? do a craft? mow the lawn? paint a room? clean a bathroom? organize the garage? have a friend come over? go to a store? play on the computer? blog, facebook, or tweet? take some pictures? make Mickey Mouse waffles? plan a homeschool year? sort through the mail? play in the sprinkler? Getting 6 ladies (I'm in that mix) to agree on WHAT to do on any given day can be challenging. Definitely not as easy as picking out what shampoo to use or which color flip flops to wear. ((((SIGH))))) Time to start the day ...

Sitting at the lunch table with my 12 year old, we suddenly got a call from National Geographic. I didn't answer it. The name and number came up and I felt relieved that I wouldn't have to speak to the person on the other line. Long ago I remember ... having just 2 phones (1 upstairs and 1 downstairs) phones with long curly cords rotary phone phones with BIG number buttons phones withOUT answering machines phones and separate cassette answering machines phones that didn't have call waiting phones without caller id annoying dinner time calls from GALLUP poll. Back then you ALWAYS answered the phone. Nowadays, not so much. I have a landline home phone, but hardly anyone ever calls on it EXCEPT for the "annoying" ones. I'm connected to my cell phone so is my husband so is daughter's #1 and #2. What a difference 30 years makes.

Growing up I had a mom who could talk and talk and TALK ! She came to all my field trips. She knew all the neighbors and had coffee time after school several times a week. She spoke at length with the lady/fella (her term) at the cash register. She spoke to strangers like she knew them all her life. This was my mom. Her name is Geri . And, there is no one quite like her. *I'm fairly certain there was a cigarette inches from my head and my dad was drinking a beer ... oh the 70's! There are things I got from my mom ... her need for a clean environment her inability to sit down and relax her energy and slim figure (although I am shorter in stature and tinier in build) her high expectations of others and outward disappointment (sigh ... a definite cross) her issues with self esteem (although I recognize mine and really do put forth effort to work through it) What I didn't get ... outgoing personality her ability to be a chatty conversationalist (although MY husband may beg to ...

Normally it seems like summer will never end in my neck of the woods, but NOT THIS YEAR. We didn't have a particularly hot summer, September was cooler than normal, and October ... well, that month had about 22 rainy/cloudy days. The gloomy weather matched my moods. There were a few days here and there that I felt all the wonderful things a blessed mother like myself should. Just the other day I texted my husband to have him remind me of my wonderful life. That day was a good one. The VERY next day ... not so nice . In fact it proved to be one of my least shining moments as a mother. Somewhere in that day I believe I threatened to pack my bags and take a break from all of "this". It was BAD ... trust me. Maybe it's the rain. Maybe it's the lack of vitamin D. Maybe it's all this talk of H1N1 (swine flu) and it's fear factor Maybe it's the way people talk to one another. Maybe it's the way I see how Hollywood stars are not just admired for t...

I've been known to have strange dreams. Most people have. Last night involved continually finding random bottles of ketchup in the fridge. Then it was the Husband telling me how sour the Coffeemate was. My list is growing. Apparently my dreams are letting me know that it is time to clean out the refrigerator. FUN (not)

Today's homily by one of our priests (Fr. Bass) was so MEANINGFUL. It really spoke to me about the way I have been feeling lately. He talked about people who are on the go ALL THE TIME. For so many families today, that includes many. We want to include God and prayer in our days, but we occupy our time with so much, that finding that balance is so hard. There are also those who spend so much time in prayer that living out their faith is next to impossible. It's all about finding that balance . For me it has been one of the most difficult things that I struggle with ... especially these last few years. I'm always feeling guilty about something ... not spending enough time with individual children, not listening enough, not doing enough of what I think I should be doing. Stretched , mentally exhausted , spread thin , overwhelmed ... great words to describe how I feel most days. I love moments that I feel enlightened. Lately though, I must admit to having that exp...

Thoughts I really don't like to HEAR ... "Finally! ... a boy" "She had twins ... a boy and a girl ... perfect! Now there is no need for getting pregnant again" No, I am not pregnant. My sister-in-law is ... with a boy. This of course is the first boy grandchild for my husband's parents. They just found out yesterday. My own family has many more grandchildren and an EVEN amount of boys and girls. I saw that "Finally, ... a boy!" comment on my MIL's Facebook page. She didn't say it, but someone she is "friends" with did. At least my MIL responded with " And a boy, what a nice surprise!" And I don't know the person who just had the twins, but apparently she went though IVF and got the so called "perfect " scenario. Who decided that one boy and one girl were PERFECT? Of course this is what my MIL had and I will not say who said the second statement above, but you can try to guess. I really have a har...

I'm frustrated with the "free" background ... it is slow and a lot of it just isn't my style. I'm not in the best frame of mind for writing lately ... my blog shows that. I think my goal this summer (when I "think" I will have time) is to learn how to create MY OWN background. I wonder if I will do it? Hmmmmm ... *See, I can't even write in complete sentences that flow well.  I think that is how I operate lately.

Let me first say, that I listen, read, and watch FOX NEWS . Some people despise that form of news media. I do however bounce to other networks. Like today for instance. I read this  FIRST and then ... I read this SECOND CAN YOU SPOT A BIG DIFFERENCE? Lately  I find that there is a lot of extreme thoughts that are spoken and written as "truth" ... especially when it comes to politics or people.  When I hear the news I am totally swayed by some of the emotion.  I think that NEWS people/journalists should just report facts because I can form my own opinion. *I'm sickened over that story that I linked to.  

When you are stuck inside for the most part, your usual subjects just don't seem as interesting. So what's a girl like me to do? Find other things to take pictures of ... These are the shoes I wear most days.  They match everything I wear (sad) and  are quick to put on. This is what sustains my 3 year old ... carbs, juice, and vitamins.  Sounds yummy huh? This is the project that consumed most of winter break.  It required lots of sugar cubes, lots of homemade icing, lots of grainy spray paint, and lots of daddy input ;) This is the lovely CHIA pet that {m} got for Christmas.  Poor thing had a hair growth issue.  I guess nothing ever looks exactly the way it proclaims to. Ahhhhh ... this is the lovely drink that my husband made for me on New Years Eve.  I rather like this photo which shows that sometimes at night, clutter just seems to not bother me so much when I have a good drink ;)  May have to make a request tonight for one of those.

It's been a rather grumpy start to the new year for me. Too many hours away from home with the  girls and their nutty schedule (swimming and basketball) Too many school projects at one time makes for really full weekends  Too many doctor, orthodontist, and dentist appointments this month Too many phone calls to insurance and oral surgeon office Too many schedule changes Too many entries onto the calendar Too much pain in my mouth with extra wires (gearing up for surgery) Too many TEARS Too many feelings of self pity (blushing) Too many feelings of disappointment Too many life changing decisions to make Too many   MANY's Hoping for a better outlook come February.

Miss {c} cutting her coupons ... It took us a while to clean up that mess, but for 45 minutes I had peace and dinner was made in a timely fashion. YAY!

FOOD ...  And can't forget some dessert ...   That's right, I am not going to be too fussy about eating foods with just a bit more calories.  While I can chew, I am going to indulge just a bit ... not overdo it though ;) This has turned out to be one of those weeks.  Bitterness, anger, frustration, and tears have made their way to me.  I hate whining about anything, but the whole surgery/insurance thing with my upcoming jaw surgery is totally WRONG.  It makes no sense to me.  I won't get into it, but I would appreciate PRAYERS. (((SIGH)))) Now, I am off to shop for just a little bit of comfort.