Don't you just HATE IT when you have something big to say

and no one around to say it to. That drives me nuts.

So here I go, trying as quickly as I can to blog my thought down. Goodness knows how I always have something going on in my mind, but half the time I forget to write it down, or say it to someone, then the thought is lost for weeks. Hopefully what I jot down is coherent.

Today's EPIPHANY ...

I do NOT want to send my girls back to the school they are in. I registered them (just in case) back in February. At the time I did not want to deal with people asking me a lot of why questions. Some days I am still not sure as to all the whys.
I want my girls to love school, and have some fun at the same time. They do have good days ... sometimes.
I dislike number grades in the early years. It has already made me feel like I put more pressure on my girls to get above a 93 (an A). Someday in highschool and college, they will feel that pressure to get good grades, but I want them to learn foremost, and not just aspire to get a certain grade.
I dislike busy work when that is all that seems to be accomplished. Mostly I feel like info is drilled in and forgotten. I want the stuff they learn to have a connection so that it will be remembered. Obviously not everything we learn will be remembered (I can attest to that), but I do think that the manner in which things are taught can be more stimulating ... more thought provoking. To me those things are what we remember.
I don't want my girls in a school that is all about "following the rules" 24/7. Sometimes it seems like their priorities are all out of whack. I want them to learn good character traits, but I also want them to LEARN. Sometimes it seems like 75% of the time, the class is BUSY being disciplined in some way. My girls have to sit and wait on those who cause disruptions.
I want my girls to be able to work with people and not just independently. I do think team input/work is important. Very little /if any is done of this.
I send my girls to a school that has teachers that are stressed, grumpy, and frustrated. YES! These are the words my girls use to describe their teachers. Where is the JOY in teaching??????
I could go on about the things my girls are NOT GETTING ... good exposure to art/music, writing, etc. Will I give them all I wish they would get? Again, I am not sure, but I will do my best.
TEXTBOOKS, WORKBOOKS, .... ahhhhhhhhhh! Children neatly seated in rows, looking at their books, writing down the answers that the teacher will need to check in her wonderful answer key. THAT DRIVES ME NUTS! Where is the creativity? I know that some questions have one answer, but that sole method of learning is boring, boring, boring!

So onto HOMESCHOOLING ...

NO, I can't guarantee that I will be a happy, loving, excited teacher all the time, but I would be willing to say that I am sorry when things don't go as they should. I don't know of many teachers who apologize when they have bad days. I don't know of many teachers in the school that my girls go to that verbally acknowledge good behavior. Mostly this makes me SAD.
I am not looking to shelter my kids from everything that I don't like in this world, but I would hope to provide them with the proper direction to make good choices when they get older.
Am I anti-school?... no, not at all. I am just not for a school that doesn't uphold with the standards I aspire for my children.
For the past 2 years I have felt stressed and worried each and every day that I send my children to school. I worry if they will do all the "right" things and if they will get the "best" grades. I really don't feel like I was this "type" of person before my children went to this school. I know that I will worrry some whether I will teach them enough, but I also know that I will hold MYSELF accountable to this.

Hmmmmmm .... those are my thoughts for now. I am sure I will think of more later ;)

Feeling every bit of 46 ... ugh!

When I was 45, I was feeling fabulous. I was fit, energetic, and I thought I could easily pass for 40;) Age was just a number and I certainly didn't think I felt or looked my true age. Then February 11th came and I turned 46. I have sciatica on my left side, my left knee is stiff, and I have plantar fasciitis in my right foot. I've resorted to stretching all the time and popping the occasional anti-inflammatory. There are dark circles under my eyes that I've had to start putting concealer on. My hair is growing out from last years 45 year old short hair, but it's just in an awkward stage. I can't decide if I want to cut it again or let it grow out. I even thought of styling my hair differently by doing a different hair part. That was a terrible idea because I was SHOCKED to see how much gray is now growing in the center of my scalp. I also think my metabolism is slowing down because my mid section seems a little thicker ... ...

"The Loveliness of The Seashore"

What is the "Seashore" like? "Where the sky meets the sea ... The seashore is a place where the sea and the sky are the same smoky gray until ... the morning sun breaks through. The hot noonday sun feels warm as a big soft cat covering you. And it seems there is nothing in the world except the sound of the wind and the rising and falling of waves." Over at Dawn 's there are so many wonderful books suggested on her blog. Earlier this month I couldn't help but to peek at some of them ... thanks Dawn! *The above quote came from The Seashore Book . The ocean moves in and then moves out. This place where water, sky and earth meet is never the same. The tide comes in, the tide goes out, each wave that returns pushes against the incoming swell as it is pulled back into the endless depths and swallowed into the vastness of an unknown deep. Such is each day of our "daily" lives. I grew up enjoying the sights, sound, and the surf of the NY/Jersey "shor...

A scattered post ...

I throw myself into stuff all the time. It can be anything from the start of a swim season, a new school year, the election, a vacation, an exercise routine etc. I'm kind of in a phase where I really don't know what my focus should be. I turned on the television and honestly, I have no idea what is on this fall season ... NO IDEA AT ALL . If I watched television in the past few months, it was something kid related or Fox News. I NEED A NEW FOCUS. My current thoughts ... reading a fictional, just for fun book stepping up my exercise routine thinking about our Christmas wish lists and shopping baking more ... I really am slacking in this area ways to save money so that we can get a new (second) washer and dryer for the upstairs (not a fancy kind because this would mostly be used by my oldest two children)... I actually have hookups. I wonder if a lot of people go through a sort of "lull" period this time of the year. Surely it doesn't last long with the start ...

"A Wink and a Smile"

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