Somebody who makes a big difference. I know, I know ... I already am mommy to 5 minnies and that is a great big job. There are days that I feel really good about my role in their lives, but other days can be so darn frustrating.
I love being a stay at home mommy. In earlier days it was a bit chaotic (who am I kidding? I still have a lot of those type of days. I can just handle it better)and emotional. Many times I just felt overwhelmed and on occasion I just wanted to flee (sometimes I still feel that need). Nowadays, I feel like family life is a well oiled machine (most of the time). We are always busy ... activities, work, learning, etc. Now that I have children of babysitting age, I even get a little freedom to myself at times. I'm so glad for those little time-outs now.
STILL ...
I long to do something that showcases a little bit of me. I love taking pictures. I especially love a good story. When I can see a story in a photo I am drawn to it. Last summer I even took a photography class to better learn my camera and its many functions. Unfortunately I took the class and my camera didn't get the exercise it was longing for. Not sure what happened there??????
As my girls get older I would like to help contribute in a monetary way to our family. The big $$$$$$ signs are starting to pop in my head when I realize that my oldest daughter is only 5 years away from college. I would love to do something that could bring in money without taking me away from our family. This winter I took a finance class (beginner stocks) and it was really quite interesting. For years I listened to terms and felt like a complete idiot because it was totally foreign to me. Now I feel slightly "informed", but I still have a lot to learn. After this class, I had great intentions on diving in and immersing myself into this new arena. Life got super busy this spring and what I hoped would happen DIDN'T HAPPEN ... huh?????
This isn't the first time that my life didn't seem to go as I thought it would. I went to college and graduated with a BS in nursing (RN). I was supposed to get married and work for a while, then have a family ... maybe 2 or 3 children. The order was juggled a bit. I did graduate, get married, and had a baby in a matter of 4 months. Life then blessed me with many busy days ... various moves and 4 more children. I guess I am still a nurse, but just to my family. My career never evolved in the working world.
Maybe the various things that I have learned in my life are not what I was meant to do in a big sense. I am not just a mommy, just a nurse, just a photographer, or just an investor. Maybe I am ALL THAT wrapped up into one.
STILL, I feel called to do and be something more.
SOUNDS kind of selfish ... wanting more.
This past year has proven to be the absolute craziest, but best time in my whole life. It's been quite an emotional one too. I lost my Dad to cancer, started homeschooling 2 children, took a photography class, took a stocks class, started back with an exercise routine, went through a complete year of RCIA with my husband, and re-evaluated a lot of things within the family.
WOW! Just one year and all that!
STILL, I feel called to something more. God has managed to come into my life in a very big, bold way this year. For many years, HE was there, just in the background (or so I thought). Suddenly I see HIM everwhere. Things that didn't make sense to me now do. How do I deal with this???? Let HIM in (my daily life) and do something about it.
I've got some ideas floating around in my head. I hope and pray this time for my vision to really happen. I don't just want it to be a small part of me, but a GREAT BIG PART OF ME.
I have a great feeling. I really do!
I love being a stay at home mommy. In earlier days it was a bit chaotic (who am I kidding? I still have a lot of those type of days. I can just handle it better)and emotional. Many times I just felt overwhelmed and on occasion I just wanted to flee (sometimes I still feel that need). Nowadays, I feel like family life is a well oiled machine (most of the time). We are always busy ... activities, work, learning, etc. Now that I have children of babysitting age, I even get a little freedom to myself at times. I'm so glad for those little time-outs now.
STILL ...
I long to do something that showcases a little bit of me. I love taking pictures. I especially love a good story. When I can see a story in a photo I am drawn to it. Last summer I even took a photography class to better learn my camera and its many functions. Unfortunately I took the class and my camera didn't get the exercise it was longing for. Not sure what happened there??????
As my girls get older I would like to help contribute in a monetary way to our family. The big $$$$$$ signs are starting to pop in my head when I realize that my oldest daughter is only 5 years away from college. I would love to do something that could bring in money without taking me away from our family. This winter I took a finance class (beginner stocks) and it was really quite interesting. For years I listened to terms and felt like a complete idiot because it was totally foreign to me. Now I feel slightly "informed", but I still have a lot to learn. After this class, I had great intentions on diving in and immersing myself into this new arena. Life got super busy this spring and what I hoped would happen DIDN'T HAPPEN ... huh?????
This isn't the first time that my life didn't seem to go as I thought it would. I went to college and graduated with a BS in nursing (RN). I was supposed to get married and work for a while, then have a family ... maybe 2 or 3 children. The order was juggled a bit. I did graduate, get married, and had a baby in a matter of 4 months. Life then blessed me with many busy days ... various moves and 4 more children. I guess I am still a nurse, but just to my family. My career never evolved in the working world.
Maybe the various things that I have learned in my life are not what I was meant to do in a big sense. I am not just a mommy, just a nurse, just a photographer, or just an investor. Maybe I am ALL THAT wrapped up into one.
STILL, I feel called to do and be something more.
SOUNDS kind of selfish ... wanting more.
This past year has proven to be the absolute craziest, but best time in my whole life. It's been quite an emotional one too. I lost my Dad to cancer, started homeschooling 2 children, took a photography class, took a stocks class, started back with an exercise routine, went through a complete year of RCIA with my husband, and re-evaluated a lot of things within the family.
WOW! Just one year and all that!
STILL, I feel called to something more. God has managed to come into my life in a very big, bold way this year. For many years, HE was there, just in the background (or so I thought). Suddenly I see HIM everwhere. Things that didn't make sense to me now do. How do I deal with this???? Let HIM in (my daily life) and do something about it.
I've got some ideas floating around in my head. I hope and pray this time for my vision to really happen. I don't just want it to be a small part of me, but a GREAT BIG PART OF ME.
I have a great feeling. I really do!
Comments
Those precious precious little girls need you. Kiss them love them really enjoy these years.
My youngest is going to school next year and I am going to start working. Wow... time flies.
Great post.
He chose you before the foundation of the world for Him, to be here doing what you are doing. He chose were you would live and He is guiding your choices. Do we not just have to sit back and say "I am willing" and He promises to become a BIG part of you.
"And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge - that you may be filled to the measure of all the fulness of God" Eph. 5vs17-19.
The Donk is a friend I workd with for around 7 years until a few months ago. we would usually swim or run at lunch. we both do triathlons.
It might not always seem like it, what with all the hassle of raising kids, but you are doing huge things for God right now.
Sam and I used to always feel like we should be doing something 'bigger'. But now we are pretty content with our lives.